The disappearing cube

I am answering a Frequently Barked Question today.

FBQ: What are your least favourite toys?

I’m going to tell you about a couple of toys that weren’t a success. My bipeds say they’ve seen lots of dogs having fun with them, but these toys just weren’t right for me.

They showed me a ball and I watched while they put treats in it. It was obvious I needed to roll the ball around to make the treats fall out of the holes. I dashed around with it, bashing into the furniture. Each time the bipeds stood a chair back up, they told me to slow down! It only took me a couple of minutes to empty it out. They tried to encourage me to eat the treats that were on the floor, but after I’d eaten a couple I wasn’t interested in eating any more.

Mulberry, the cat, was having a lot more fun than I was. He was pretending to play ice hockey, using the treats as pucks. He dived about and he very soon had all the treats under the furniture. The bipeds took the ball away, I don’t know why they looked so disheartened. Then they moved the furniture and cleaned up the treats.

The next day they took the toy outside. I flicked it around until I’d emptied it – it was even quicker to do this outdoors as there was no furniture getting in the way and slowing me down. They kept pointing out the treats that were on the grass and that reminded me that I enjoy digging. They groaned and asked me to stop. That was really boring, so I asked them to play football with me.

A week or so later, the female biped showed me a cube. She rattled it and told me it was interesting. She knelt on the floor and showed me how to tip it over with my paw and that treats came out. It didn’t seem any more interesting than the ball had been. She sat back and encouraged me to do it for myself. I thought it would be more fun to flick it over than to knock it gently. I lifted my paw and brought it down hard on one corner of the cube. The cube flicked up like a tiddlywink. Now I was having fun!

I was still a puppy, so I didn’t take much notice of the funny noise that was coming from the biped. I wasn’t even curious about why she’d covered her face with her hands, or why her eyes seemed to be leaking. I was having a great time flicking the cube and seeing how high I could make it go! It wasn’t many minutes before it landed in the middle of the table. I was thinking about putting my front paws up on the table to get it when my biped removed the cube. I followed her and she put it in the cupboard. I don’t think I’ve seen that cube since!

Ahoy there mateys! from Wikipedia

Ahoy there mateys!
from Wikipedia

A few days later my bipeds were chatting and the female said, “It’s really embarrassing having a black eye. Everyone wants to know how it happened, but they don’t look as though they believe the answer!”

The male replied, “You could always wear an eye patch!”

“But I’d look like a pirate!”

He chuckled and said, “I’d rather have had a black eye than the bruises I had when we tried to teach her a high-five!”

They both laughed then, but I think they’re really pleased that I play gently now!

See you next Wednesday!